Plan to Live
by Hand Over the Bishies
Summary: This story happens during Edward & Bella's first summer together. After prom & before Bella's birthday Bella wants to turn into a vampire forever, but Edward won't change her. What will she do? Ending is just a summary due to personal reasons.
1. Decoy

**A/N: HI! This is a new story that I had in mind. Each chapter is really short, though. Not that I can do anything about that. That's just how it is. Enjoy!**

Decoy

"Edward?" I said as we lay in my bed, like the countless number of other times.

"Yes, love?"

"Would you still love me if a vampire changed me?"

"Of course. But no vampire will ever get near enough to do that," he replied confidently. He'd never figure out that I was planning to get Alice or Jasper to change me; thank god Alice didn't think or say anything though.

"Bella?" Edward asked after a few moments of silence.

"Yes?"

"The guys are going hunting tomorrow evening; Jasper and I are getting a little thirsty."

My plan was working out even better. Jasper was the easy target. "Oh, okay. Can I come over before you leave?"

"Sure." I could hear in his voice wanting to ask why I wanted to come over, but he didn't ask.

Wow, this was too easy. But when will trouble start to appear? It always does, concerning me.

I let out a big yawn.

"Sleep time for the human," Edward murmured. He started to hum my lullaby and I quickly fell into my last slumber.

**A/N: how was my second try at fanfic? review please!**


	2. Torn

**A/N: YAY! I got 32 hits for the first chapter! :D sadly, no reviews. But that's okay, I gues... Anyways, this title referrs to Alice. enjoy!**

Chapter 2: Torn 

It was a good thing I dreamt dreamlessly, because if I didn't, I was sure to have let slip my plan through my sleep talking.

"Good morning, love," greeted Edward as I began to move around.

"Mmmm…good morning," I mumbled.

I got up, had my human minute, and grabbed a granola bar from the kitchen on my way out to my truck.

Edward was already sitting in the passenger seat, knowing he couldn't take driving my "slow" locomotive.

As we reached the house, a blur of Alice came rushing up to my door, pulled me out, and ran me upstairs to her bathroom before I could say anything.

"Good morning to you, too, Alice."

She looked at me sternly. That was rare…

"Don't you 'good morning' me, Bella. Your stupid plan is going to work! Think of what it'll do to Jasper and Edward. And I'm feeling horribly guilty right now for not thinking or saying anything. Now, you're in for a 4-hour make-over and trying on at _least_ 10 outfits without complain. And if you don't cooperate, I'll tell Edward."

I nodded, too scared to say anything.

"Bella?" Alice said, her harshness replaced without concern, as she turned back to me. "Is this really what you want? How you want it to happen? Think of how Edward will react."

"I know it'll be worse for him if he does it. I want to spend eternity with him-starting as soon as possible."

Alice sighed and got to work.

After a short while, Alice came around and began to act more like her bubbly, cheerful self. It was torture, as usual, but the end results were great, obviously. I put on a little show for Edward, Esme, Emmett, and Jasper. Rosalie sat off to the side, once again glaring at me for being the center of attention, and Carlisle was at work until an hour before he and the boys were to go hunting.

The regular banter commenced after my display ended. Emmett and Jasper went to play video games; Emmett's thoughts annoyed Edward, so he tackled him, Jasper fueling the fire with more anger and ferocity, Rosalie getting annoyed, Alice dragging me to a "mini" shopping trip (which, to her, means about two hours…)

As I had dinner at the Cullens', Carlisle came in. I had become extremely alert, knowing that I'd have to act soon.

**A/N: can you try to give me 2 reviews please? Thanks! :D**


	3. Sleeping Beauty's Thrist

**A/N: This is the longest update for this story! It had to be this long cuz I couldn't cut it off anywhere sooner. Enjoy!**

Chapter 3: Sleeping Beauty's Thirst

I finished up, cleaned the dishes, and went to the living room to see Emmett and Rosalie making out on the loveseat, while Jasper sat in an armchair reading, and Alice was presumably upstairs looking at her new purchases. Edward, of course, was with me through dinner and sat down beside me on the couch.

"Bella?"

"Yes, Edward?" I replied.

"Alice needs me upstairs for a little while for something…she's blocking me. Do you want to stay here or go upstairs to my room?"

My mind clicked fast. "I'll stay here. Maybe I'll watch a movie."

He got up, giving me a quick peck on the lips, and went up the stairs, between human and vampire speed.

Now to get my plan in motion. But how to do it? I could surprise him…no. that would never work. Hmmm…aha! I got it!

I rose from the couch and went in the kitchen. I made a few soft clanking noises with the pots to get a bit of attention and called out in a normal voice, "Jasper?"

In a blink of an eye he was there in the doorway.

"Yes?"

"I think I need a bit of help. Do you mind?"

"No, what do you need?" he asked. I could tell he was a bit on edge from his thirst, being cautious, but that was a good thing.

"A few things. First, could you block your mind?"

He looked at me suspiciously, but nodded.

"Thanks. I need your help over here," I said, gesturing him to come closer.

"Ummm…I don't think that's a good idea, Bella."

"Come on, Jasper. I trust you. And you need practice!" I added cheerfully. "I need you to look at something, and you can't when you're all the way over there."

He sighed and walked forward slowly and carefully. I knelt down, hiding myself from his view with the island and he as he saw me crouch by the lower cabinets, he looked confused. I waved my hand again to motion him to kneel down too. He looked wary, but cut off his breathing and came beside me.

Then he took a slow, deliberate breath to ask, "So, what did you need me to look at?"

This was the weird part. I looked at him through my lashes, trying to dazzle him as Edward does to me so often, (though it probably wouldn't work as well) and leaned towards him, giving him a hug. I placed my neck right up against his, my heart beating over his silent one. He tensed, but held his breath again and hugged back tentatively.

I decided to start. "So," I whispered, fingering his chest. "Now that you have your food in front of you, are you going to play with it first, or stuff yourself until you're full?"

Jasper pulled back from the hug quickly, looking terrified, but I reached out and grasped his collar with both hands, making sure he couldn't leave without bringing me along.

"Bella, you're not food," he said, but it sounded more like he was trying to convince himself of that.

I pulled myself to him again and murmured, "Are you sure about that?" as I blew in his ear, making him feel my warmth.

I got pulled back again, but not as far as last time. I was still fairly close to him. Jasper's face was looking at me, his dark eyes betraying him-undecided. I needed to convince him.

"You're thirsty. Food is right in front of you, offering itself to you…"

Then he muttered something that sounded like "Sleeping Beauty…apple… slumber…"

I remember that story, and smiled at the irony that his mind had wandered to that. "Yes, you're hungry; take a bite. Everything works out in the end, remember? Nothing bad will happen."

I leaned towards him, extending my neck and putting it in front of his lips. I brought his hand up over my heart, making him feel the blood pulse through me.

I saw his eyes glaze over, and he looked deep in concentration. I reached p my other hand to his lips, and used my fingers to pry them open and keep them open as I rubbed my neck against his lips. That hand came down to hold the back of his neck in place, and I felt his teeth graze over my throat.

_One last push,_ I thought to myself. I made myself feel thirsty, thinking about a mouth-watering milkshake I'd had the other day. The thirst I was making myself feel would surely push him over the edge.

I peered back at his face and saw his eyes go aflame with wild desire. My eyes shut quickly.

I gasped as I felt his teeth sink into me.

**A/N: I hope you liked that update! :D sorry about the long waits in between. reviews?**


	4. Mayhem

**A/N: I'M SOOOOOOOOOOOOO SORRY!!! Especially to my readers of Immunity!!! you don't know how much crap I'm going through right now...I'll have Ch. 12 of Immunity up this weekend definitely! I love you all! and i'm sorry that this chapter is so short. but that's how this story is. that's how it'll be until I end it at a weird place. I'm kinda disinterested in this story. I liked the first 5 chapters, which I wrote all together, so I'll sum up and finish around chapter 8 or 9 maybe.**

* * *

Mayhem

Right then I heard the door to the kitchen bang open. Did Jasper close it? Alice burst through, Edward immediately behind her, and everyone else hurrying into the room.

They saw us and the men tacked Jasper, trying to get him to let go of me. Esme and Rosalie ran out, unable to take the smell or sight of my blood, while Alice held her breath, grabbing a cloth to stop the blood from coming out of my neck. Emmett and Edward held their breaths as they and Carlisle managed to get Jasper off me. The three of them wrestled him outside as he snapped, hissed, and struggled against them to get back to me. Alice pressed the cloth to my wound, picked me up in one arm, and ran me upstairs to Edward's room. She muttered that she'd be back in a few seconds.

I could feel the fire raging down my neck, burning me, killing me, causing me inexorable pain. But I kept my mouth tightly shut, not wanting to scream, or for the Cullens to feel guilty, seeing how I'd brought this onto myself.

**A/N: PLEEEEASE review! I need to improve my writing skills, I just know it! but how is the question...**


	5. Burn Baby Burn

**A/N: yes, I have returned! you must hate me if you followed this story and now it's being updated, but honestly? I'm pathetic and I know it, so...I can't really change that. anyways, hope you like this chapter.**

Chapter 5: Burn Baby Burn

I felt the flames move down my throat to my shoulders and lungs, making me feel the worst pain imaginable.

The fire was everywhere. It felt as if I was being roasted from the inside out. My head was being fried, my throat was a desert.

I wanted to scream but I couldn't.

I wanted the pain to end, but it wouldn't.

I wanted to die, but I was trapped.

I couldn't remember the reason for living. I couldn't form coherent thoughts because of the flames in my head. I was a prisoner, with flaming bars, flaming floor, flaming ceiling, flaming walls, no way to get out, being burnt alive. I couldn't do anything about it.

That's how it was for three days.

It felt like centuries, not years, not days, of endless torture. Then, just then, I could feel the pain slowly, minutely, start to subside from the tips of my toes. Excruciatingly slowly. Another century of death-wishing went by until my hands and feet were free from the pain.

By the time the fire was only in my torso I could have sworn another fifteen centuries of being charred had come and gone. And the flames got hotter as they deceased in the area in my body. The degree must be over a what should be a thousand degrees Celsius already.

I could feel my heartbeat decrease, getting more and more faint as the fire got hotter and hotter, more and more concentrated in my heart. And though the flames in my arms and legs had disappeared, a fire a hundred thousand times stronger, more piercing, lit in my torso. I could feel my heartbeat decrease, getting more and more faint as the pain took over my mind.

After what seemed like an eternity, I felt the flames only in my heart. The agonizing fire was scorching my heart. It got hotter, hotter, hotter, until I thought I would just die from the pain, but then there was a little burst of heat and my heart made its last splutter, never to beat again.

**A/N: YAY! so I hope you liked it. chapter 6 is done & ready to go, but I have plans for writing ch7,8, and 9 (the final chapter). thing is, it won't be for another month or so cuz I have TESTS GALORE for some reason, even though we just got back to school! so, please forgive me, and lots of love!**


	6. Alive Again

Chapter 6: Alive again

It was weird. I could sense people in the room before I even opened my eyes. I heard others swiftly climbing the staircase to where I was. I also knew that I was resting on Edward's big, soft bed in his room.

I slowly opened my eyes, making them wider and wider. When they got as large as they could go, I just stared. And stared, everything was as clear as crystal-no, even clearer. It was like looking at life through a microscope. I took in everything, every little detail - from the smallest creases in the curtains to the slightest scratches in the south-facing window to the miniscule dust mites floating in the air.

Then it registered in my mind-I was able to do _so_ much more in my head than before. There was so much more room for thinking-I could think more than one thought at a time and the information never left my brain.

I gasped in surprise at all of this. Then I sat up quickly, in even more shock. I got overwhelmed. There was so much to _smell_. When I gasped I tasted so much on my tongue, but it was more like I as tasting different flavors. But these weren't actual flavors of food-it was the smells. I could _taste_ them. That was _so_ weird.

There was a small thought in my mind as all of this was running through my mind: _'Hmmm…I'm fast, too.' _I took that thought and wondered at why I thought it. It took me a split-second to realize I did all of this, since my waking up, in under two seconds.

'_Holy crap,' _I mentally said to myself. _'This is going to take some getting used to.'_

"Bella?" came a hesitating voice that had it's own taste as well. It reminded me of…

My head snapped in the direction of the voice. Edward was standing in the doorway, Alice, Jasper, and Emmett behind him, the latter two in crouching positions.

"How are you feeling?" Edward continued. If possible, Edward's voice sounded even better tan it did when I was a human. Its taste was a lightly flavored version of his wonderful smell.

I blinked and said, "Fine…but it's a bit overwhelming-there's so much to take in. I didn't expect it to be like this."

I spoke this all very quickly, though I was sure they heard and understood what I said.

Another thing that shocked me was my voice. It had changed from low and a little rough to smooth, beautiful and harmonious sounding.

"You aren't…thirsty?" he asked curiously. His speed of speech was definitely slower than mine.

I suddenly became aware of a mild, slightly uncomfortable burning sensation at the back of my throat. I raised my hand to my neck.

"Ummm…just a little. There's a kind of…small aching in the back of my throat, but it's manageable."

All of their expressions were contorted in confusion.

"So…you don't want to attack us?" he asked cautiously.

"…no…why would I want to do that?"

The four looked at each other. Then Edward stepped forward carefully, Jasper and Emmett keeping their defensive stances. Then I understood that _I_ was the danger. Hmmm.

Edward made each step with caution. I was confused why they were still being really careful. It wasn't as if I was going to run out or attack anyone, or do anything rash like that.

Edward reached out to touch my cheek. He caressed it, then embraced me in his arms. I noticed his touch was a very comfortable temperature now, and wasn't as hard as stone. He felt more real and…more human? No, that wasn't the word. But he felt more familiar, the way a human feels to another human. And he _smelled_ even more wonderful than he did when I was a human too. How could that be possible?

As I returned his hug, Alice came prancing up lightly, grinning like there was no tomorrow.

"Bella! You're up!" she said happily.

I let go of Edward and returned the smile and enthusiasm. "Yup. And it feels _really_ weird."

She laughed delicately. "Don't worry, you'll get used to it."

Before I could say anything, Jasper was in front of me. Funny, but I somehow _watched_ him come out of the corner of my mind. Emmett was now standing at the door, no longer in a defensive stance.

"Are you sure you're okay, Bella?" he asked.

"Ya-totally and completely. Thanks," I assured him.

He furrowed his brows. Edward chuckled. I looked to him.

"You're so odd, love," he said. "Right now-no, when you first woke up- you should've been mad with thirst. We were going to try to restrain you from attacking the locals."

My eyebrows creased in confusion, just like Jasper's. "So I _was_ supposed to go out of my mind…" Then I grinned. "Well, it's good that I didn't!"

I could practically feel their emotions in the air - ranging from confusion to amusement. But then again that could've been Jasper a little control from his shock. I giggled quietly.

"What's so funny, love?" Edward enquired.

"Your reactions," I replied truthfully.


	7. a summary of the end

Hello everyone. I'm sorry about this story, but I don't think I'll be able to come back to it for another while. Personal reasons have made me a different person. My heart is scarred, and it hurts to even think about Twilight, type it, etc.

This was from my planning a long while ago, but I have never been able to look at it. It hurts right now, so I'm doing this quickly.

This is the summary of what was to be the last 3 chapters of this story. If you would like to know how this story ends, please read on. If you don't because you are upset at me or don't feel it's worthwhile, then thank you for reading up until this point.

* * *

big space... in case someone doesn't want it spoiled...

Plan to Live Ch 7

A/N: this will be a VERY short version of the BD hunting scene, sine I think it's one of the OK parts of BD. Excuse me if I didn't like it and have my own opinion about it.

BD scene.

— line—

Bella getting to know more about what it is to be a vampire (all the perks and cons and responsibilities)

A/N: this was supposed to be a short story, but it seems like I can't just finish it off nicely…I'm getting more and more ideas, so please continue reading! But, I'll try as hard as I can to wipe my hands of this story because there's no point in me rambling in it. You'll be seeing more generalized chapters with lines in them to make it seem shorter and to get the plot moving.

Ch8

The Cullens figure out Bella's power

— line—

Bella practices her power

Ch9

Volturi come visit (Alice sees them though, obviously) to try to convince Bella, Edward, and/or Alice to join them. They're unsuccessful and leave.

The Cullens live happily ever after.


End file.
